Mid Life Lessons

"Yes I am wise, but its wisdom born of pain".

 I was singing at the top of my voice driving my new luxurious dream car that I have recently bought for myself, when tears started to roll down my cheeks.  Read more »

Happily Ever After just Livin' the dream with the love of your life? Are these phrases you respond with if someone asks how you are? 

Or ...  do you file these statements in the too good to be true basket and dismiss them as naïve and unattainable for you or anyone for that matter?  Read more »

What is a Myth really these days? 

It's a popular belief or story that has become associated with a person, institution, or occurrence shared by a group to illustrate a cultural ideal.   It's a fiction or half-truth that forms part of an ideology.  Our ideology being the set of beliefs by which a group, family or society subscribes to but it can also be based on speculation that is imaginary. Read more »

When I hear statements like "just do everything in life in balance" it can sometimes be a clue that the person dishing out the advice, might just be a perfectionist setting an unachievable benchmark for you and me to try to live up to.  Some people are great at talking the talk, but not so impressive when it comes to walkin' the walk.  

Are we really all striving to do everything in life in balance all the time? That's a big ask! Read more »

You know those toys toddlers play with that includes a rubber hammer and three pop up characters?  As the child hits one of the characters on the head, another pops up in its place, but the three characters don't all show up at the same time?

We hear a lot about the value of seeking out in our lives stimulating 'food for thought'.   We are advised to keep ourselves intellectually nourished and our minds sharp.  In my view, there is an extraordinary amount of intellectual information available in this day and age that challenges the way we think, what we think and how we think. 

But what about 'food for feeling'? Read more »

When Robert Redford said to Michelle Pfeiffer "I've been here before" Michelle's character answered "Me too".

In the movie Up Close and Personal they were playing mid life characters both with a few marriages under their belt.  Their characters were both high achievers in their careers and the breaking point they both always seemed to reach in past marriages presented itself once more, this is when Robert Redford uttered these words. 

Within each of us lies the potential for us to act with the grace of Gentlewoman and Gentleman or alternatively with ..... the aggression of a full flight Bitch or Bastard.  On any given day we can choose to be either ....a shining example .... or a bloody good warning. Read more »

I have always much preferred to feel angry rather than sad.  When I am angry I feel empowered, protected, strong and in control.  When I am sad, I feel vulnerable, weak, exposed and embarrassed.

I have been a person who decided at a young age that it was the wisest move for me to hide my heart and its delicate and sensitive feelings.  As a result, I grew into an adult that held onto this habit at the expense of my own happiness.

It is easier for me to fight with someone who is trying to love me and get closer to me, than it is to surrender to the love I feel for them.  Read more »

When it comes to working with lovers, friends, family or spouses it can sometimes be a delicate emotional balancing act.  It requires a sensitive but robust emotional structure.  It is so easy to slide into the habit of bringing personal issues into the workplace and professional problems into the home. Read more »