Food, Sex, Booze & Drugs

Making amends for past wrongs done to others is an important part of the recovery process.  It's called cleaning up the wreckage of our past.  I remember making amends with Joe my ex-husband and the father to my two sons during the first year of my recovery.  It was cleansing and helped me take ownership of my past behavior and empowered me to make a fresh start and regain some self respect. Read more »

"I don't compete with women, it doesn't interest me" I heard myself say last night at an inner city restaurant in Bris Vegas.  Mr. Delicious (my husband) and I were dining with some friends and a few new business associates.  I surprised myself when I admitted this out aloud. 

"I am only interested in competing with myself, and upping the bar as time passes."  I went onto explain to the others seated at our table.  Read more »

"I could stop drinking if I wanted to, I just don't want to." I would say defensively when someone bravely suggested I needed to slow down with my boozy lifestyle.

I remember watching Melrose Place in the early 1990's.  I can't remember who the actress was, as I was too pissed at the time, sculling cheap wine as I relaxed in front of the T.V.  But what I do remember, is that one of the female characters was going to recovery groups because she was an alcoholic. Read more »

I am lonely, and I can be lonely with a gorgeous woman on my arm. Fuck is this all there is? I am bored with females to be really honest. Josh was angry and needed to vent.

“If I am sober and straight, available, attrative intelligent male talks to me, I am terrified, I just want to run. What is wrong with me?” Sue pleaded fighting back her tears. Read more »

As we entered the Sheraton Noosa on Hastings Street, I saw her circling my husband and my dear friend Dan.  She was staggering but not too far gone.  A good looking, well dressed, middle aged woman with great hair, who would be embarrassed if shown footage of herself now, tomorrow morning.

“Let’s watch for a while?” I asked Lily touching her elbow to invite her to another table.  Her husband Dan was the next sexual meal this Predatory Woman was working on devouring.  If only she could stand straight. Read more »

As I wrote my last journal entry this morning in my 2009 companion, and closed my word swollen, dog eared, well travelled confidant … I felt a flicker of grief. Read more »

I heard this phrase years ago.   It was in a recovery group somewhere and a woman who had put down one addiction was now finding she had started to eat regularly for the first time in her life and was putting on weight.  The reality was that she was actually only just beginning to eat like a healthy human being again after years of being emotionally numb and disconnected from her body and her natural appetite. Read more »