As I wrote my last journal entry this morning in my 2009 companion, and closed my word swollen, dog eared, well travelled confidant … I felt a flicker of grief.

01/01/2010 - 07:39

As we entered the Sheraton Noosa on Hastings Street, I saw her circling my husband and my dear friend Dan.  She was staggering but not too far gone.  A good looking, well dressed, middle aged woman with great hair, who would be embarrassed if shown footage of herself now, tomorrow morning.

“Let’s watch for a while?” I asked Lily touching her elbow to invite her to another table.  Her husband Dan was the next sexual meal this Predatory Woman was working on devouring.  If only she could stand straight.

01/02/2010 - 05:53

I first heard this term 14 years ago when I started attending drug and alcohol recovery groups to clean up my own life.  So it concerns me when I still see people killing themselves as their ego clings to this belief like mine did.

“No I am better than them; you don’t understand it is different for me”.  The line usually goes something like that and then the victim dialogue begins.

01/03/2010 - 06:42

A few years ago, my wallet got lifted from my briefcase whilst I was working on my laptop from a busy inner city coffee shop in the heart of Sydney.  I didn’t notice it was gone until after I had given my keynote presentation on “Emotional Fitness”.  I was leaving the podium and went to give a delegate my business card to find my wallet had been stolen.

01/04/2010 - 10:31

For some leaving a relationship and for others staying in one requires divorcing ourselves from our own heart and self respect. The relationship may be with another person, a career, a member of our biological family, our birth country or perhaps even our lifestyle.

01/05/2010 - 07:43

If you’re not into the whole concept of marriage, change the question to, ‘Would you have a long term committed relationship with you’?

Fourteen years ago when I was a fear fuelled, firm bodied female aged 33, my answer to this question( if I could have been honest with myself long enough to answer, which was most unlikely) would most definitely have been “No Fuckin’ Way!”

Today aged 47 with more wrinkles, hail damage (cellulite) and gravity taking its humorous toll on my loyal body, my answer to this question would now be, “Absolutely”.

01/06/2010 - 11:03

“Your talk was the first white fella recovery talk I have ever heard that makes any sense to me for my people”.   She looked deep into me with her magnetic chocolate eyes and gave me a gentle smile.

This Indigenous Elder in far North Queensland early in 2009 stood after I had run my morning workshop to offer her opinion.  I have never felt so honoured as she and the other attendees applauded me with a standing ovation.

01/07/2010 - 09:55

How do you dress your heart each day? How do you address yourself in other words? With love or dissatisfaction?

I slept late this morning, later than usual.  I am normally awake by 4.00am and am ready to start my mediation by 5.00am.  Mr. Delicious left to play golf before work early this morning giving me a gentle goodbye kiss that woke me.   I looked at the clock; it was 4.30am but my body was still very tired, so I went back to sleep.  Before I knew it, it was 8.30am.

01/08/2010 - 11:57

“You’re such a nasty person, you have to say such nasty things” she accusingly spat her words down the phone at her daug

01/11/2010 - 10:46

I am lonely, and I can be lonely with a gorgeous woman on my arm. Fuck is this all there is? I am bored with females to be really honest. Josh was angry and needed to vent.

“If I am sober and straight, available, attrative intelligent male talks to me, I am terrified, I just want to run. What is wrong with me?” Sue pleaded fighting back her tears.

01/12/2010 - 09:18